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FAQ: "done exactly what it said on the tin"

 

“Just to let you know my order arrived nice and early this morning, to recap this was my issue, ordering from eBay and nothing turning up for weeks on end and then a crap product, safe to say (like Ron seal) you done exactly what it said on the tin :0)

 

You are what we call a trusted supplier and would feel more than confident in ordering from you again.”

 

I appreciate that for a lot of people, ordering stuff from social media or whatever and then hoping and praying for it turn up is all part of the new instability in modern life.

 

Is it going to on the slow boat from a certain country for a month or more?

 

Then when it does arrive, is that box is going to be empty? (either literally or value-wise?)

 

 

It’s a weird time and frankly I understand where everyone’s coming from.

 

But it does mean that with just a bit of actual effort and customer service I can get a high quality product out to people when they are willing to reach out and ask a question.

 

 

Rather than those idiots sitting there scared behind a keyboard, assuming the internet is full of foreign drones looking to take your money and run.

 

Which it is, but none of them work here at Sword and Stone.

 

 

Anyway you’re here for the FAQ, so here it is, warts and all:

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#1 "so how long does it take from order to delivery"

BY EMAIL:

Okay, so how long does it take from order to delivery? As you can imagine I have ordered a few knives, been screwed over from China (but that’s my fault, little shits) and recently tried Canada, just looking for a nice set of knives that won’t go blunt to replace the hammers we are using at the moment.

 

Regards

D

 

TIM:

 

D

If you order on a working day, it'll usually be dispatched the same day and arrive within something like 24-48 hours depending on where you are in the country.

I understand your concern but I'm not sure the nationality of the people who make the knives is your worry, but rather the quality of the workmanship. I understand especially since the COVID-19 debacle we're all a bit suspicious of Chinese products and China in general has a negative reputation in the press.

However, having myself attempted to source British made knives I can tell you a few things:

1) First there are very few British-made premium chef's knives on the market for less than about £100 and if they are, then someone somewhere is lying to you. This is a reflection of how difficult it is to manufacture anything in Britain right now and I make no apology for going further afield to get it made and available to customers for less.

2) The British-made knives that I have sampled are of questionable quality. The first sample I had from a Sheffield firm I won't name actually rusted within three weeks. Others that I know of keep the big price tag and "British made" label but use low quality steel. Forest and Forge knives for instance are about £100 but their blades score something like 55 on the Rockwell Scale of Hardness. The Spitfire by comparison scores 57.5.

So as far as British-made being superior - I think unfortunately that may now be a distant memory preyed upon by devious marketers.

On the other hand you will also probably know that most tech companies have their very best products built in China, including Apple's iPhones which many would say are the most popular on the market, if not actually the best available.


Ultimately D it's your choice, but as with anything from any country, there's good and there's bad.

If I'm selling crap, then no-one comes back and I make no money. It's not a viable business model for me if it doesn't work for my customer.

Thanks
Tim

 

 --

 

#2 "propper checks"

BY FACEBOOK:

I just wanted to say without  propper checks you do realise young kids are buying  these knives  very easily  & carrying  them on the streets !!!!!

 

TIM:

Thanks for your quivering message, but I usually count four exclamation marks in an email as at least three too many.

 

If you were to take the time to understand the platform you are using, read our product page and go through the checkout process yourself, you might find that you stop shaking long enough to type a sensible message that would merit a less sarcastic response!

 

In any case, since I will assume you’ll probably share this message, I will respond to the question buried deep:

 

Visit our site and you’ll see that:

  • All of our orders are sent via Tracked shipping which requires sign off by the recipient (so the postie checks their age if necessary).

  • A clear age warning is placed on the product page itself.

  • Social media advertising (especially Facebook) does not allow advertising to anyone below the age of 18 and all of our Sword and Stone campaigns are directed at people 25+

 

I need also hardly point out that at £45, our Spitfire is not some cheap piece of scrap metal.

 

It’s a premium chef’s knife for passionate home cooks and frankly I think you’d struggle to use it for anything other than its obvious designed purpose!

 

So in conclusion, this message is just wrong and it’s scaremongering on the back of a serious societal issue. While it might make you feel better to go after me and my little business, that won't help in the slightest.

 

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#3 "can women use this"

BY FACEBOOK:

(Various on this theme, on almost every advert we put out)

 

WHY CAN’T WOMEN USE IT?

UNLIKE NORMAL KNIFE HANDLES THIS ONE CANNOT BE HELD WITH YOUR HAND, INSTEAD IT IS WIELDED WITH YOUR P*NIS, HENCE ONLY SUITABLE FOR LADS.

 

 

TIM:

I’m not really sure if this is a question, but I will do it anyway just for fun since he keeps coming back and is clearly enjoying himself.

 

No:

 

Women, can’t use the Spitfire because we’ve installed a member-scanner on our website which prohibits females from buying!

 

So there it is. You’ve discovered our dark secret!

 

Okay not really, but then I'm not sure this was ever a serious question.

 

 

=

 

if you've come this far, then I recommend taking a swing back by the Spitfire page here - just to make sure you haven't forgotten anything...

 

 

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